paula.red at 2016-02-13 14:13:43:
Scene 5 Ext. movie theatre –night A red carpet night: the glamorous opening of a movie! Countless people in fancy wardrobe chat in front of the theatre, while others pass on the red carpet. A young woman Alice (26) approaches an older woman Caroline (40+). Alice “ Hey! Aren´t you Caroline Herford?” Caroline: “ Yes, I am. And you are…?” Alice: “your probably don´t remember me: we´ve worked on a film together several years ago. You where the producer!” Caroline: “ok, and you where..?” Alice: “Actually, I was an intern.” Caroline: “Right. So which production was it?” Alice:” Oh, geez, I don´t remember… the name of the film was… uh.” Caroline: “ Which director was it?” Alice: “ Ah, he was really tall! Really tall guy? Kinda blondish?” Caroline: “Sorry, not so good with remembering hair color. Better with names.” Alice: “well, my name is-“ Caroline (turns to leave): “ actually, I gotta run now-“ Alice: “ ah, wait! There is something you surely must remember! Oh, that was SO funny!” Caroline: “ yes?” Alice: “Yes! You where hilarious!” Caroline: “Me?” Alice: “ Totally! (laughs) I still see it vividly. It must be, what, seven years ago?” Caroline: “ So what did I do?” Alice: “ It was the wrap party; and the crew was dancing, but a bit shy about it you know? And you totally wrecked the dance floor hahaha with the producer, bald guy? (no reaction from Caroline) You where hahaha dancing some sort of polka haha and you crashed with him, right into the chairs, you landed right on top of the producer hahaha, oh geez, everyone laughed so hard because, uh, when you got up hahaha you couldn´t, you know?” Alice wipes a tear. Caroline (icy): “ I don´t remember that.” Alice: “ But you are Caroline Herford, right? I mean, I never forgot your name after that.” Caroline: “ Well, if you tell me your name, I´ll make sure I´ll never forget it either.” Alica: “ great! So I am –“ Cut to black.
estarcarr at 2016-02-19 10:23:42:
Feedback 8 Hey,Paula! I like Alice's dialogue. Not so sure about Caroline's, though. Would she really give this seemingly insignificant intern this much of her attention at first? Maybe stress more why is it important that she try to remember this embarrassing woman. Perhaps you did, and I just didn't pick up on it. I like the ending!
RealThndrMonkey at 2016-02-25 17:58:00:
It was good enough to make me want to learn more about these twords characters. Why did Alice approach Caroline? Why did Caroline stick around for this story? Which makes me think that the story should be closer to the start of the conversation, which may lead to why Caroline tries to figure out who Alice is, but more importantly... what does Alice know. Feedback One