SCENE 3 EXT. MIDDAY FOREST GLADE Malcolm runs to Princess Edina. Her body is a rag doll on the moss. Bradwr’s blade sticks out of her chest. Her breath is jagged as she catches sight of him. EDINA: There you are. He crumples in front of her, scared to move even her hair which has splayed around her. Even now she is beautiful... graceful. MALCOLM: Yup. Were you looking for me? EDINA: I wanted to say... MALCOLM: That I have somehow disappointed you? Broken download much? EDINA: You are frustrating. MALCOLM: There’s the girl I know. EDINA: I am not a girl, I am the Princess Edina. MALCOLM: You must have gotten a hit on the head because we’ve already met. EDINA: Stop... MALCOLM: (singing) I’ll stop right now but I’m stopping with you. I‘ll leave this town but I’m leaving with you. EDINA: You do not make sense. MALCOLM: I work hard at it. EDINA: I must tell you. MALCOLM: Shhh, save your breath. EDINA: I said... MALCOLM: You need to rest. EDINA: ... that you... MALCOLM: We can fix this. Someone will come. EDINA: ... had no... MALCOLM: We did it. We stopped him. We sent Portia and James back. After all that, it has to work out. EDINA: ... honor. MALCOLM: You were right. I’m disrespectful, rude, unreliable... EDINA: (angrily) Do not make me beg to be heard. Princess Edina reaches her hand out, Malcolm takes it, tenderly. EDINA: It has been a privilege to know you Malcolm Duncan. You are a true champion of our people.

SCENE 6 INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT Eyes open. Pan out to see a YOUNG WOMAN lying peacefully in bed. The dregs of sleep cast a serene beauty upon her. She lies above the covers, however, revealing that she is still fully clothed. A blouse, a skirt, nothing fancy, but with the look of an outfit worn for some time. She sits up quickly, scans the room. It is cozy, lightly furnished. Oddly enough the wall opposite her is a large window, beyond it concealed by shadows. Click. A light. She dreads her new ability to see into the adjoining room. MAN (O.S.): Good evening. I hoped you would wake around this time. INT. OTHER ROOM - NIGHT At the center of the room is a large metal chair, not unlike one found in a dentist’s office. It starts to turn slowly, mechanically. A YOUNG MAN is strapped on the chair, struggling, his cries for help muffled by the rag in his mouth. A groan escaped the woman’s mouth and she jumps for the window. MAN (O.S.): Do you recognize him? I sincerely hope you like your surprise. INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT (CONT) The source of the voice steps into view, the two close intimately close if not for the thick glass that separated them. He is older, but not by much, and wears a butcher’s uniform. BUTCHER: What did this one do to you? I can tell it was not very nice. Did he mistreat you? The woman has to push a button by the window in order to be heard. WOMAN: (a practiced plea) Please, please, don’t. He didn’t do anything, please let him go… The young man’s muffled yell overcomes her voice. She glances at him, and the butcher studies her expression. He smiles. BUTCHER: You don’t have to lie to me, my dear. They all get what they deserve, you know that. WOMAN: (defeated) He… he cheated on me. BUTCHER (CONT): Yes. And how did that make you feel? No response. BUTCHER (CONT): What did you say to him? When you approached him? WOMAN: I… I forgave him. Tried to make him stay. Told him I… I- BUTCHER: But he didn’t, did he? A pity. He didn’t know what he had lost. The butcher approaches the chair. The young man’s struggles intensify. A bone saw materializes in the butcher’s gloved hands. INT. OTHER ROOM - NIGHT (CONT) The woman bangs on the window with both hands and screams, but all we hear is the whir of the blade as it rips through skin and bone. His work complete, the butcher drops the saw and returns to the window. His clothes, face are speckled with blood. INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT (CONT) BUTCHER: Before we found each other, I had no purpose, no drive, just this… talent. But you have inspired me. Now I use it for you. He raises his hand to the back corner of the room. There in the shadows we can see the silhouettes of more mangled corpses. BUTCHER: I know what I am. But you… you bring this out in me. This passion. There is something about you that cultivates an alien feeling within me. I both crave and despise it. A feeling I can’t grasp. What is it called? The woman, in tears, refuses to answer. The butcher smiles tenderly and strokes the window where her face is, another intimate moment ruined by the barrier. BUTCHER: We’ll learn it together. Click. Darkness. The woman collapses on the floor.

Scene 4 Int. living room- night A woman (35) is bundled up in scarf, blanket, glasses on, watching a movie, glued to the screen. She´s wearing headphones so we don´t hear the movie, only see her face (children´s toys on the floor explain the headphones). She is tearing up, extremely moved by the film. A key can be heard in the lock. Her husband (40)ncomes in from outside, carrying a suitcase, wearing coat and scarf. Taking them off, he peeks into the living room and catches a glimpse of his wife. She doesn´t notice him, she is immersed in the film, almost crying. He stands in the door, watching her watch the film. Even though he isn´t moving, she suddenly notices him. Her reaction is like someone waking up from a dream she´s reluctant to wake up from. Woman: “oh, you´re back! Wait! I can´t –just have to watch the ending, ok?” He: “sure.” Cut to: Int. kitchen -night He is munching on some leftovers. She comes in, blowing her nose. Woman: “here you are, finally back, and I´m totally elsewhere. Sorry!” They embrace. He: “that´s ok. As long as I can embrace what´s left of you.” She laughs: “oh sure, scoop it up in one hand.” He takes her chin with his hand, He:” I´ll start with your lips. “ and kisses her. He: “I´ll get to kiss them a bit, and you keep thinking of that good looking actor who just declared his love for the super expensive lead actress. “ She laughs: “he was good looking.” He: “just stay with him in your mind. The hair, the muscles. The paycheck.” She laughs. He kisses her neck. He: “I´ll just benefit from his good work. But what´s that? He didn´t get you undressed? Here, let me help with that...” He takes her huge woollen scarf from her shoulders. She: “I was cold” He: “ all alone with Richard Gere.” She: “I had to make due with him while he has no body heat.” He: “ and that´s where I come in.” They kiss passionately. She.” I´m so glad to have you back…” He takes her to the bedroom.

Feedback 4 Hey Nicholas, I can´t really give any input with that scene -except for it´s WAY too dark for me... Do you really think the butcher is talking about love? And the woman: if she know´s what is coming, why does she play along this game? Why go silent when he wants to put the words into her mouth? I mean: other than the reason this task requires it? Maybe I shouldn´t give feedback on it if there´s nothing I can relate to; but I liked your other stuff.

I appreciate your feedback Paula. I can see your concerns. My goal was he doesn't understand the strange emotion (being a psychopath and all) and is studying her reaction to things she loved in order to define it. I do agree that she should be a little more reluctant to participate, though. Thanks for your input.

SCENE 4 EXT. FENCED PASTURE – DAY In the early evening sun, Sophia (40’s) leans on the fence in contemplation, as a black horse prance around the pasture. Jonathon (late 40’s) joins her at the fence. She does not look at him. Jonathon: Finished for the day. Sophia: Fine. Thanks for letting me know. Jonathon: Grabbing my tools unless you have something else for me. Sophia: No. Jonathon: You’re sure? Sophia… Sophia: Please, Jonathon. Go. Jonathon does not move. The horse approaches them. Jonathon: Have you figured out what you are going to do with her? Sophia: I don’t know. No one wants her. She’s too old. Jonathon: I know what I’d do with her. Sophia: You do? Jonathon: Yes. I’d keep her. She might not be the youngest horse, but she is beautiful and full of life. Sophia turns and meets Jonathon’s gaze. Their faces, radiant in the setting sun.

Scene 04 EXT. PARK - DAY DEBBIE (late 20s) and PAUL (late 20s). Side by side in awkward silence, while in the background people stroll and children play. Then a BLACKBIRD flies by. They follow its flight with their eyes, until it perches on a tree branch. Debbie laughs. DEBBIE You remember that day? A blackbird up on a tree?... PAUL And us on a bench... (Smiles) I remember that first day as if it was yesterday, though so many years have passed and so many things have changed. We have changed. (Smile runs away from his face) And I'm a failure. DEBBIE You've got to trust yourself. I'm here. I trust you. Paul is energized from wistful to hopeful. PAUL Do you? Kitty. DEBBIE Long time since I've been called that. PAUL Long time since I called anyone that. DEBBIE Never once? PAUL None was you. Debbie struggles against a smile, but her eyes, the stopping of breath, show she's radiant. Paul takes her hand between his, hope in his eyes. PAUL Back then I thought your mother was right, you could find someone much better than I. DEBBIE My mother was wrong. I never did. She leans into him, their bodies meet. Her lips reach his lips, they KISS and embrace.

Feedback 04 Nice use of subtext, both from Sophia and J, I really like it. It's a very short scene, perhaps some words from Sophia, since this is for a dialogue exercise, or at least some action that shows if she does/does not reciprocate J's feelings.

SCENE 7 INT. GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DAY TINA, 40s, dons her coat as MICHELLE, 19 stands by her. TINA: Sit down, Michelle. I'm sure you and your grandmother have a lot of catching up to do. GRANDMOTHER sniffs and cuts her eyes up at Tina. GRANDMOTHER: And where are you off to already? TINA: While I'm in town, I thought I'd visit some friends. GRANDMOTHER: No time for your own mother? TINA: Don't start, please. You wanted to see Michelle and here she is. Leans over and kisses the top of Michelle's head. TINA: I'll be back in a couple hours. Hurries out the door. GRANDMOTHER: Well, come on over and let me look at you. Michelle moves toward the chair where the older woman sits. Her grandmother beams at her. GRANDMOTHER: You made a pretty girl. MICHELLE: Thank you. A tear runs down the older woman's cheek. GRANDMOTHER: You were only six when they took you away from me. No wonder you act like you don't know me. They never gave a thought to me when they moved. Gets up out of the chair. GRANDMOTHER: Here, I've got something to show you. Michelle rises. MICHELLE: Can I help you? GRANDMOTHER: Keep your seat, honey. Leaves the room, returns a couple minutes later with a box. Michelle sits forward on the sofa to watch as she opens the box and pulls out a child size homemade quilt. MICHELLE: It's beautiful. Did you make it? GRANDMOTHER: Every stitch. Holds the quilt up showing the back. GRANDMOTHER: Do you remember these Mickey Mouse sheets? You wouldn't sleep on anything else. Michelle smiles and nods. Her grandmother turns the quilt around to show the patchwork. GRANDMOTHER: See this patch here? All that pretty lace? That's from your favorite Easter dress, and this one here is from the little apron I made you for when we made cookies together? MICHELLE: My favorite. Peanut butter. GRANDMOTHER: That's right. Do you remember that doll I gave you when you left? Michelle pauses. MICHELLE: I remember that doll. Every time I picked it up, it said "Mom-myyy. I cried every time it did that. I wanted to cut it open and take that voice box out. GRANDMOTHER: That's how I felt when they took you away. I wanted to cut my own heart out. Michelle kneels beside her grandmother and hugs her.

SCENE 1 INT. LOUNGE - EVENING A septuagenarian couple sit in a lounge that looks to have been designed in their youth. The MAN is plonked on a faded brown leather armchair near the television, and the WOMAN knits on a floral couch further back. They sit apart, but both face the television, which shines out at them in the yellow light. A male INTERVIEWEE drones from the television. INTERVIEWEE (O.S.): We do all sorts of things to keep her spirits up, you know, it’s been a long and hard road and it gets to you... it gets to her, having to be so vulnerable around everyone for so long, so it’s really on us to remind her that’s okay, and a big part of that is actually just goofing off around her, you know, just being vulnerable ourselves and embarrassing ourselves, really. You gotta act crazy around the ones you love, I think. The screen light cuts to another colour and ADVERTISEMENT MUSIC blares into the room. The woman hurriedly grabs the remote control and mutes the television. Returns to her knitting. The man pauses, staring at the television. Then he whirls and waves his arms in his armchair, bouncing about in a strange robotic fashion. The woman is surprised; she stops her knitting and watches. MAN: Bleep bloop doop bloop bloop! The man stops. He sits still for a few seconds, then turns his head to the woman with a small smirk. The woman smiles, shyly pleased. Returns to her knitting. The man looks back to the television, content.

FEEDBACK 1 You set up the strained relationship between the mother and grandmother quite nicely, by giving the mother actions which quickly and efficiently reveal her apathy towards her mother. The grandmother's relationship with her granddaughter I thought could have used some more effective exposition. Her emotional transition from being angry her daughter to literally crying with happiness upon looking at her granddaughter is extremely quick, and the line, "You were only six when they took you away from me," is a bit heavy-handed on the exposition, and perhaps could have been conveyed less pointedly. Keep writing!

SCENE 9 Expensive restaurant. DAY TIME. Almost no one just a man and woman having lunch near the big window. RYAN (33) dressed in good suit and NATALY (37) blonde in elegant dress. There are 2 glasses of wine on the table and some cheese and fruit plate. RYAN: that was really great to work on that project. Especially with you. NATALY: Oh thank you. RYAN: our project is over and that is the first time when I sorry, that the work is done by time. NATALY: You know RYAN you are increasable specialist. That was pleasure to work with you. RYAN slowly pulled his hand to her hand (there is white silver ring with big beautiful yellow stone on pointing finger) and touches it. NATALY: Ryan what are you doing? RYAN: I just want to look at that ring. It is magnificent. NATALY: Oh go ahead. Look, I just thought that you are trying to touch my hand. She laughs and he laughs as well. RYAN: No, no, no. Just the stone. NATALY: I have another one She reaches out her right hand with another ring with green big stone. Ryan grabs her hand with both his hands and compasses it. NATALY: Are you sure.. RYAN: Oh sorry. He releases the hand. Takes the glass with wine. RYAN: let’s drink for us. NATALY: for us and for successful project RYAN: Of course. They drinks wine. And lapses into silence. RYAN: I am in the bathroom. Will be right back. INT: Men’s bathroom. RYAN stays in front of the mirror and talking to himself. RYAN: You sit to her, and take her hand again. Ok? That simple. Take her hand sit with that hand and what? FUUCK! I Figure it out on the place. Shit, I need to tell her something, but what? What?. INT. Corridor near the bathroom. There are pictures on the wall and NATALY looks at one them. Ryan comes from the bathroom into corridor. RAYN: Hello ! Are you in the bathroom as well? And he tries to seep past her to the restaurant. NATALY: look at that picture RYAN: Picture? He turns to the picture and found Natalie staying between him and the art. He' confuses just for a second and they step to each other and kiss and hugs greedily. INT restaurant the same table 10 min later. Natalie and Ryan sit near the table. RYAN holds her hand in his hands and stares in her eyes. The RYAN’s phone rings on the table. He looks thievishly on it. NATALY (with smile) is it your wife? Go ahead, answer. Do not give her any hint. And I talk to my husband as well.

Feedback 5 Hey, Tom! Cute scene! Acting crazy around the ones you love! You get the message across between the 2 of them visually. So, a reminder that this is a "Dialogue Writing Challenge." Perhaps they can also have a nonsensical discussion, trying to out-do each other in their silliness? Just a thought...

FEEDBACK 7 Good work here. I could feel the tension of their attraction through the dialogue. My only feedback is that some of Nataly's dialogue could be removed/reworked as a "showing" action, I think: "Look, I just thought that you are trying to touch my hand" seems unnecessary, and her final line. I actually thought initially the ring was her wedding ring, maybe show that (as well as Ryan's ring) instead of saying it. Thanks!

Thank you Nicholas. I thought that it is obvious that people can undersigned that that couple already know about marriage. But now I think that I need to play around it

Thank you, Tom! I appreciate the feedback.

Hi Tom, I agree with estacarr, I think if you beefed up the silly dialogue it would work very well. Cute scene.

Scene 7 INT. KITCHEN - EVENING ADAM, Late 50s stands at the stove, tending to a bubbling pot - stirring, adding herbs, stirring some more. At the nearby dinner table sits LOGAN, his younger brother. Late 20s. Tired and bored. Waiting for dinner. LOGAN So. When are you leaving? ADAM Hm. In a hurry to have your place to yourself again. (beat) Oh, don’t worry. I’m not offended. I know I’ve been in your way these past few days. LOGAN That’s, uh. Not what I… okay. ADAM It’s not that I don’t think you can take care of yourself. I guess I’m just here for my own peace of mind. I hate to worry about you. LOGAN I’m fine now, you know. ADAM I know that’s what you’re telling me. If having me here is really making you uncomfortable… maybe I could just stop by every couple of days. Check in. LOGAN You could do that. But… A beat. Adam waits for his brother to finish. LOGAN But, uh… are you gonna make dessert, too? ADAM (Smiling) I can. Any requests? LOGAN Yeah… yeah, those strawberry tarts you used to do when I was a kid. ADAM Ooh. Haven’t made those in a while. Not sure that I remember the recipie... But… ah, for you. I’ll see what I can do.