Kung Fu Panda (2008) Screenplay by Jonathan Aibel and Glenn Berger; story by Ethan Reiff and Cyrus Voris https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4QhtknV99C4 VIPER: I don't understand what Master Oogway was thinking. The poor guy's just gonna get himself killed. CRANE: He is so mighty! The Dragon Warrior fell out of the sky on a ball of fire. MANTIS: When he walks the very ground shakes. TIGRESS: One would think that Master Oogway would choose someone who actually knew kung fu. CRANE: Yeah, or could at least touch his toes. MONEKY: Or even see his toes. (Po appears and considers the criticisms he just heard.) (Inside the dorm, Po tries to sneak into his room, but accidentally pushes his way into Crane's room instead.) PO: Oh...hey...hi. You're up. CRANE: Am now. PO: I was just...uh...some day, huh? That kung fu stuff is hard work, right? Your biceps sore? CRANE: Um, I've had a long and rather disappointing day, so, uh, yeah, I should probably get to sleep, now. PO: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. CRANE: Okay, thanks. PO: It's just---oh man, I'm such a big fan! You guys were totally amazing at the battle of Weeping River. Outnumbered a thousand to one, but you didn't stop, and you just...whoop! Yah! Ka, ka ka! (Po kicks a hole in the wall). Ooh. Sorry about that. CRANE: Un, look, you don't belong here. PO: I know. I know. You're right. I don't have...it's just, my whole life I've dreamed of--- CRANE: No, no, no. I meant, you don't belong here. I mean in this room. This is my room. (Pats floor.) Property of Crane. PO: Oh! Okay, right, right. So...yeah...you want to get to sleep, I'm keeping you up. We got big things tomorrow. All right. You're awesome. Last thing I'm gonna say. Okay. Bye bye. (Po closes the door. Crane sighs and Po returns.) PO: What was that? CRANE: I didn't say anything. PO: Okay. All right. Good night. Sleep well. (Po closes the door.) PO: That seemed a little bit awkward. (Po sneaks down the corridor and is confronted by Tigress.) PO: Master Tigress! Didn't mean to wake you. Just, uh--- TIGRESS: You don't belong here. PO: Uh, yeah, yeah. Of course. This is your room... TIGRESS: I mean you don't belong in the Jade Palace. You're a disgrace to kung fu and if you have any respect for who we are and what we do, you will be gone by morning. (Slams door shut.) PO: (Crushed) Big fan. DIALOGUE ON DIALOGUE: Both Po and the Furious Five are embarrassed by Po's presence. Po feels outclassed and out of place, while the Furious Five believe he's an interloper whose presence is purely accidental and undeserved. In this scene, the tension between them is brought to the forefront as they struggle to work out their uncomfortable relationships. The conversation between Po and Crane is one of subtext---they're dancing around the point that neither wants to speak: Po is out of place. When Crane states "You don't belong here," Po tries to apologize, then Crane tries to soften the blow by claiming he only means it pertaining to his room. He's trying to be gentle. When Tigress speaks the same phrase, Po assumes she means the same about her room. But Tigress dispells any chance of misunerstanding. No subtext---she uses on-the-nose dialogue to crush Po and hopefully chase him away.

Jumpin' Jack Flash (1986) Story by David Franzoni; screenplay by David Franzoni, Charles Shyer, Nancy Meyers and Chris Thompson; Steven E. de Souza (uncredited) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKC6UsetwN4 POLICE DETECTIVE: Tell me again. TERRY: If you'd stop picking your teeth you could hear what I had to say. POLICE DETECTIVE: We gotta get the facts. MARTY: What are you doing here? What happened? TERRY: I told him not to call anybody, but they fished your card out of my pocket. MARTY: You're wet. TERRY: Really, Marty? God, you're so perceptive. POLICE DETECTIVE: You know her? MARTY: I work with her. POLICE DETECTIVE: She nuts? We found her screaming, soaking wet, waiving down cars near Battery Park. MARTY: What happened? POLICE DETECTIVE: Fell in the river. TERRY: I told you. I didn't fall in the river, I was thrown. POLICE DETECTIVE: By your pimp, your john... TERRY: What is it with you people? Every time you see a black woman it has to be a pimp or a john? What, you think there's a lot of work down on the pier for hookers? You think I'm giving blow jobs down there to goldfish? POLICE DETECTIVE: Is she on some kind of medication? MARTY: Not that I know of. (To Terry) You on some kind of medication? TERRY: Marty! (To police detective) You know, you can talk directly to me asshole. POLICE DETECTIVE: Watch your mouth. TERRY: There is a dead man floating around in the river. MARTY: I think it's time to go home now. POLICE DETECTIVE: We sent a car down there, lady. Look who I'm calling "lady." We found nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing. TERRY: Well, drag the river! There are killers running around the fucking city! POLICE DETECTIVE: How would you like me to wash your mouth out with a wire brush? TERRY: How'd you like if I kicked you in the nuts so hard they get lodged in your fucking nostrils? MARTY: My, that's a vivid image, isn't it? Um, officer, I---look, here's my card. Uh, I'll be responsible for her, I promise you that. Come on. POLICE DETECTIVE: You better get her to some doctor. TERRY: There's nothing wrong with me you dumb mother fucker! I told you--- POLICE DETECTIVE: That's the word I don't like. Rosie... MARTY: (Trying to gag Terry) No, no. Sir! Sir, sir! It's Tourette Syndrome. POLICE DETECTIVE: Start with disturbing the peace. MARTY: It's an illness. People can't stop swearing. They don't even know they're doing it. She has it bad. She usually spits. Really, this is sweet talk for her. TERRY: Son of a bitch! MARTY: It's Tourette Syndrome. POLICE DETECTIVE: Look up Tourette Syndrome. TERRY; ...I ever met. What are you, some sort of fucking reject from Barney Miller? DIALOGUE ON DIALOGUE: Marty Phillips ends up caught between an overworked police detective and his co-worker Terry Dolittle who has narrowly escaped being killed. Terrified but unable to convince anybody about what happened to her, Terry becomes desperate and overwrought, and Marty manufactures the Tourette excuse to try to get Terry out of a difficult situation.

Bridesmaids (2011) Writers: Kristen Wiig, Annie Mumolo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lw30B5R1Cig Lillian: Annie, everybody is really sick from that restaurant. *Her stomach churns loudly* Ooh. Annie: I bet it wasn't the restaurant. Lillian: No no no no. Annie: Lilian Lillian: Oh, no. Annie: Where are you going? Lillian: I need a bathroom. (Lillian exits the bridal store and rushes across a busy street.) Annie: No. Where are you going. Be careful! What are you doing? Lillian: It's happening. It's happening. It's happening. It's happening. (Lillian slowly squats in the middle of the street in her bridal gown.) Lillian: It happened. It happened. Bridalshop Saleswoman: Oh no. Don't you dare ruin that dress! Annie: You're really doing it, aren't ya. Your shittin in the street. (A car honks. Lillian gently signals it to keep moving.) DIALOGUE ON DIALOGUE: When it comes to embarrassing moments, nothing is worst than having to perform a very private bodily function in a very public environment. Of course, when it comes to comedy, this whole scene takes toilet humour to a whole new level: projectile vomiting, taking a dump in a sink, vomiting on your friend's head, all these scenes leading to the final climax of having diarrhea in the middle of a busy street while wearing a wedding dress. You feel sorry for all the characters but you just can't stop laughing.