[…] Osgood: l called Mama. She was so happy, she cried. She wants you to have her wedding gown. It’s white lace. Jerry: Osgood, l can’t get married in your mother’s dress. She and l, we are not built the same way. Osgood: We can have it altered. Jerry: Oh no you don’t! Osgood, I’m gonna level with you. We can’t get married at all. Osgood: Why not? Jerry: Well, in the first place, I’m not a natural blonde. Osgood: Doesn’t matter. Jerry: I smoke! I smoke all the time! Osgood: I don’t care. Jerry: Well, I have a terrible past. For three years now, I’ve been living with a …read more […]

Even Superheroes suffer self-deprecation sometimes Mystery Men (1999) Writers: Neil Cuthbert, Bob Burden (creator) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DJWMVR_yfM The clip is a little longer. The Shoveller: What are we gonna publicise, Roy? The fact that we get our butts kicked, a lot? Mr. Furious: Well, maybe if you didn't smack me in the face with a shovel every time we went out, we'd have a few more victories to brag about. The Shoveller: All right now, I'm sorry about that. I just have a tendency to lose my concentration when I've got a salad fork stuck in my rear end. The Blue Raja: Oh, oh I get it, so YOUR shovel in HIS face is MY fault? The Shoveller: You threw a spoon at the guy, Jeff! Mr. Furious: Yeah, what was up with that? The Blue Raja: I, I, I am embarrassed about that. I thought it was a fork. The Shoveller: You're the master of cutlery. You couldn't throw a knife sometimes when someone's trying to kill me? The Blue Raja: No, I can't! You couldn't, uh, use a rake sometimes? The Shoveller: No. I'm the Shoveler. The Blue Raja: Well, I'm the Blue Raja. I'm not Stab Man, I'm not Knifey Boy - I'm the Blue Raja. Mr. Furious: Yeah, that's another thing... The Blue Raja: What? Mr. Furious: Well, you could work a little blue into the uniform somewhere. I mean you've got green, you've got this little flowery thing going on, but it's like everything BUT blue. The Blue Raja: Well, if we could just step out of our literal minds, just for a moment...

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJNs2RaTKuQ Michael Bacall, Edgar Wright (screenplay) Bryan Lee O'Malley (Oni Press graphic novels) RAMONA I'm sorry. Dying probably sucks. SCOTT You know what sucks? Getting killed by THAT guy. Why him? RAMONA It's complicated. SCOTT Well, maybe now would be the time to get into it. Seeing as I'm about to die. RAMONA Alright... the truth is, it was me who was obsessed. I was crazy about him. But he ignored me. I was more alone when we were together than I ever was on my own. That's why I had to leave... and that's when he started paying attention. SCOTT So why go back? RAMONA I can't help myself around him, Scott. He just... has a way of getting into my head. SCOTT Well, that's legitimately disappointing. I really will leave you alone forever now... RAMONA No. I mean, he literally has a way of getting into my head. Ramona lifts her hair up on the back of her head, revealing a blinking CHIP implanted on her skull. SCOTT That is evil. RAMONA He's like that. Ramona covers the chip, self-consciously touching her hair. SCOTT So this kinda sucks for everybody, eh? RAMONA I'm sorry it had to end this way. We had a good run, I guess. SCOTT You can't say I didn't try. I really fought for you back there. RAMONA Uh-huh. The winds blow harder, Ramona seeming to fade away. RAMONA But someone was fighting pretty hard for you back there. Scott's eyes go wide with epiphany, SCOTT Knives? RAMONA I wish I was ever as fanatically devoted to anything as that girl is to you. Ramona slowly dissolve away in the sand. SCOTT I feel like I learned something. Which would be great if I wasn't dead. Ramona is gone. Scott slumps to his knees. SCOTT So...so alone. DA-DING. The PILGRIM-HEAD appears and rotates around Scott. SCOTT Ahhhhhh... We FLASH BACK to Scott swiping the PILGRIM HEAD, then FAST FORWARD through the breakup with Ramona and Sex Bob-Omb. We hear Scott screaming throughout this magical restart. SCOTT ...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA... 96 INT. WALLACE'S APARTMENT - NIGHT 96 We FAST FORWARD all the way to Wallace's apartment, as Scott enters. He flicks the light on. I guess when the character hits the low point before he learns his lesson there's sometimes a little self-deprecating. Trivia: The original concept for "Scott Pilgrim" is based around 2 premises. First, what if, after a life of playing fighting games, someone confronted you and you actually had the ability to fight like a "Street Fighter" character. And second, Bryan Lee O'Malley's was dating his future wife, Hope Larson, when he learned she had dated three different guys named Matthew. This led to the idea of a League of Matthews. This idea developed into the League of Evil Exes and Matthew Patel is the only Evil Ex to keep the name Matthew.