[…] Okay, this just struck me as the single dumbest idea I’d heard in a long time, so …read more […]

And now you just reminded me that this exists. This freaking song was playing on the radio all the time when I was a kid. We all hated it. I guess this would be the graduate thesis of a baby DJ school. I also agree that it's a freaking stupid idea, probably designed to exploit the anxiety that new parents feel nowadays with education being so competitive that they need to give their child every break they can find. It could just be a scam, but then it becomes like "The Producers" where the con artists running the class have to put together an actual album or something with the baby's music. The trick with this movie is that babies can't act (and even if they could, does anyone want to see a movie starring babies?). So it would have to be about the teachers and parents. Of course, the parents would be cheating as well, no rational person would send their baby to this class, so these are helicopter parents who do the kids' work for them. So it's just a big messy lie that everyone's caught up in and no one wants to admit the truth.

Let's think of a dystopian future. GATTACA style. So, babies are analyzed and scientists decide through DNA-based aptitude tests your job since you are born. You're good for being a screenwriter? You'll only be taught to do that since kindergarden. Nothing else. No choice. And people hate it. The scientists themselves hate it but they can't do too much about it. So one day a baby is born, the scientist analyzes his genes and whoa.... he's born to be a revolutionary. But obviously there isn't a school for revolutionaries. And there are rumors that those kind of babies are eliminated. So he thinks: which one of the current programs could help him become what he is meant to be? Where can you train someone to be a rebel, creative, a leader that people will follow... hmmm... so our scientist alters the data a little and our little boy is sent to become a rock star. (no, not a DJ)

Or a comedy: A DJ. A very bad one. His mixes are terrible. He's divorced and gets to see his son once a week. Today is his turn to see him, he has no toys on the house so he decides to let his son play with his DJ stuff (I don't know the name of that... thingy), push things around. The next day he listens to what was recorded and decides to publish it just for fun. Suddenly it becomes the most popular mix ever on YouTube. He becomes famous, he is offered a record deal - but his stuff is still terrible. Will his kid playing at the computer and DJ device create another hit? Of course! Will the ex-wife find out? Will the ex-wife's new husband try to block the DJ from seeing the kid?

And of course, there's "Kids Reenact 2014 Oscar Nominees" Remember that one? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w--HHuBKH4

Or Bugsy Malone http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOrgDbldcA4 From YouTube: "Bugsy Malone is a 1976 British musical film, very loosely based on events in Chicago from the early 1920s to 1931 in the Prohibition era, specifically the exploits of gangsters like Al Capone and Bugs Moran, as dramatized in cinema. Featuring only child actors (with singing voices provided by adults), director Alan Parker lightened the subject matter considerably for the children's market; the film received a G rating." So we could mix "Bugsy Malone" with the DJ idea.

Dystopias are everywhere (ironically, the bet dystopia I've seen in film lately was "Art War" ... and it was real!). I love that you mentioned Gattaca though, since it's portrayed as a Utopia instead. And what can be more alluring than being in a society that only wants you to be the best you that you can be? I can't imagine employment or anything like that is a big concern... you just do what you're best at. You're actually reminding me of Antz, where Woody Allen is a worker who decides to swap places with a soldier (Sylvester Stallone). The beauty of a child, though, is that they can be anything, we get whittled down to a speciality as we grow up, but kids... their instinct is always "I can do that!" It's one of the best things about them. Maybe it's less a of a DNA test and more of a psychic thing, a psychic can see all the possible futures and picks the optimal one for the kid to follow down. There's definitely something to be said about the dangers of settling on something too soon. Sometimes, some kids just know and they're driven, but they have to find that for themselves. Most of the time, people's interest changes, or they find that their strength in one field lends itself well to another field. Everyone thought I was going to be a cartoonist (including myself) until about ten years ago when I discovered I liked writing more. And I ironically became a better artist once I stopped taking it seriously and could play around with it more. But so much of what I learned from drawing and planning out comic books wound up being helpful as I developed as a writer. I always felt that in order to be exceptional at one thing, you have to understand lots of other things that didn't directly relate to it. The more that goes into your head, the better the stuff that comes out of it. So between that issue and the "just do what you do best," I could see an outcome of this where all the music is made... really just for the people who spend all their time thinking about music. All the movies are for people who only care about movies (so everything's artsy and weird), etc... there's no cross-pollination of culture going on, you're having the opposite of a Renaissance because it's multiple specialized groups instead of one.

You could do it as a Christopher Guest thing, have the cast be the parents of the kids in the show. Bash helicopter parenting world a little.

There's a British game show called "The Big Fat Quiz Of The Year" and one of the segments has kids re-enact an important event from the news for the panel to guess what it is. It's cute.