Reading the script I felt Susie's seduction of the audience. Watching the scene I was let down. Some of the best imagery in the script is not translated to the film. Susie is a bit sultry, but doesn't "melt" onto the piano. She doesn't slide off "oh-so-slowly". In fact, she steps down from the piano and seems to barely keep her balance. And I didn't feel the audience sucked in. Editing in some close-ups of the audience we might see how they are being seduced. All we have is a full screen shot of the entire crowd where I could read some body language, but couldn't make out facial expressions.

That's a fair point about the lack of close-ups re audience reactions. Some times, a viewer can be 'led' by the expressions of crowd members, so if we saw several onlookers ogling Susie, perhaps that would make the scene work even better on screen. I love the scene description in the script, great visual writing: * "showering it in blue notes, drawing it out, giving it smoke." * "moving like syrup down her body, over the silk that clings to her hips and thighs, down her legs to a pair of wicked arch-breaking heels." * "Susie’s voice slides silkily from a whisper to a growl, her fingers running like sand over her body." And so forth. Maybe a case where the script is better than the movie scene.