I would take the Van Damme vs Seagal route.

(SPOILER FOR THE SCRIPT)

They were so embroiled in their own personal vendettas that they didn't realize they were living next door to a terrorist. I'd have them so obsessed with getting each other that they don't see the forest for the trees. So I'd definitely make it an absurdist comedy. I'd also do many scenes without dialogue.

I'm sure they're thinking, "What? Me worry?"

I would make them psychotic characters, perhaps both confined to nuthouses, who are somehow living out a fantasy. Either as a way of keeping them engaged in "safe" behavior undamaging to others, or because they break out.

And if live-action, would have the mental disturbance extend to wearing costumes to appear exactly as in the comics.

@Emily: Absurdist comedy is great, but I'm guessing Warner Bros. sees this as an action-comedy franchise, so they will probably want to play it more traditionally.

@Yossi: Living out fantasies is interesting, then busting out into the real world ala Pandora's box. I would assume this is live-action.

It's weird that in that Howard the Duck trailer they never show Howard. I kept waiting for the reveal.

Seems like such a natural absurdist fit.

I'd play with alliances, maybe they're bffs for an unexpected spell. Cuz there's a worse foe, or one of them finally had it with a miserable boss, whatever carried the story best.

Lets hope it's not like Ecks vs. Sever

I'd play it more straight but with flair, like Mr and Mrs Smith. Have two good-looking men (think Ralph Fiennes or Clive Owen), go at with their one-ups-manship throughout the movie, one always dressed chicly in white, the other in black. The catch is, the film is set at the beginning of the end of the cold war and you wouldn't know which country which spy worked for, as that doesn't matter. Once the cold war officially ends, the two spies will continue to try to kill each other, simply because this is what they've always done and can't imagine life any other way. They give the only real meaning to each others lives. Thematically, it would be a look at how we create these massive, dangerous systems and ideologies that continue to exist only because we're too scared to imagine life any other way.

Guilty pleasure time... I rather love The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle. The show was remarkably ahead of its time but I must say they actually kinda' nailed the tone in the movie perfectly.

Of course it was a complete and utter financial disaster, but, y'know, no surprise there.

Spy vs. Spy is a tough one. It's such a one-joke, Rube Goldberg-y set up. Personally, I'd attack it with a distinct "Strangelove" bent, with world governments chasing their tails as two spies in the field duke it out, causing major consequences and catastrophes for us little people.

Hence why I'd never get the job to write it. It would bleed Terry Gilliam-esque from every frame.

Let's not forget... in the final panel of every Spy vs. Spy strip, one of them invariably end up laying on their backs, ankles up, with "X's" for eyes. How do you "kill" your main characters repeatedly and still pull of a "friendly summer" release?

Sounds like THIS MEANS WAR, the actioner about 2 CIA agents after the same woman!

Spy vs. Spy belongs in Mad Magazine and nowhere else. You're right Hollywood never ceases to amaze. This is a terrible idea.

Hey Scott,

Just passed by this post and couldn't resist responding even this far after the fact. Definitely agree with the other posters on the tone. Where else do you go with a premise that ridiculous? I would pitch it as an origin story for a yet unproduced franchise. Basically two young spies- I see young action actors with comic potential ( Ryan Reynolds, Bradley Cooper, Columbus Short)- are both applying for competing intelligence agencies, Named Black and White of course, and the entrance requirement for both is to kill a recruit from the other organization. Right there you have great comic irony and credible motivation. Maybe they don't even kill each other in the end but decide to team up and take down the system. Man the more I think about this the more I want to write. Good brainstorming indeed. Thanks Scott.

I reckon they're brothers who fought over the same girl and she died in the fight. Years later, they find each other , they've both spies - and start trying to kill each other. Going Mr and Mrs Smith way...