Elwood P. Dowd: Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me. (Harvey)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvfXvW2wsuQ

"I love the smell of Napalm in the morning." (Apocalypse Now)

"But, they'll see the big board!" (Dr Strangelove)

"Never forget, sir, that I am an ass!" (Much Ado About Nothing)

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof: Lincoln said, "With malice toward none, with charity to all." Nowadays they say, "Think the way I do or I'll bomb the daylights outta you." (You Can't Take It With You)

And my favorite (pick one, they're all nuts!)

Jonathan Brewster: Teddy, I think it's time for you to go to bed.

Teddy Brewster: I beg your pardon. Who are you?

Jonathan Brewster: I'm Woodrow Wilson. Go to bed!

Teddy Brewster: No, you're not Wilson, but you're face is familiar. Let me see. You're not anyone I know now - perhaps later on my hunting trip to Africa. Yes, you look like someone I might meet in the jungle. (Arsenic & Old Lace)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QvozC_uW-g

Psychotic can be fun. In honor of Dad's Day, Terry O'Quinn as Jerry Blake in Stepfather, starts at 7:00: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__q4sqoBFWU

Jerry: I guess you all know why I asked you here. Because when I first started at American Eagle Realty a year ago you were the first five families I sold houses to.

Neighbor: Yeah, Jerry, I've been meaning to ask to you about my garage door.

Jerry: Yeah, it would still work, Joe, if you hadn't backed your car into it.

We met doing business and we stayed to become friends. And although I may be arguing against a commission here, don't sell those houses of yours because I like being your neighbor.

Hold it. Let me get a picture with my family. Susan? Stephanie?

This is as good as it gets.

I hope you don't think what I'm going to say is pretentious. I sell houses. That's my job. But sometimes I think it's more than that. Sometimes I truly believe that what I sell is the American Dream.

You can call me sentimental, I don't care. When I came here I was a stranger. But I have never felt more at home anywhere in my life. I have beautiful friends, I have a wonderful new family...
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For the non-psychotic dads out there, here's an actual great dad moment, from Heathers, "I love my dead gay son": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NMroWnWIqs0